I want things to move quickly. I had a timeline in my head about how my future should unfold. I’m already way behind schedule. If things went according to my plan, I would be healthy and off to the next adventure.
Instead, I’ve had to slow down. I know the healing process is going to take a lot longer than I hoped. I’ve needed the patience to keep a long term perspective. It takes patience to do the hard work of healing and not take any shortcuts.
There are days where I want to take shortcuts. I want to rush things. I want to get to the ending without all the hard work that comes in the middle. I’m choosing to push through those feelings and continue to take the long road to healing.
It is starting to get easier. I’m starting to find enjoyment in the waiting. I still would love for God to hurry up the process, but I am also content with where I am now. I have a lot more patience with myself on the days where I just can’t. I am happy.